The dubious joys of Technology

Sometimes our technological wizardry can drive you nearly insane. The pace of change is such that you have to have a strong will to keep up. One of the problems is that designers often seem to design gadgets with themselves in mind rather than the average man or woman in the street who is going to buy it. 

Why, for example, does our microwave oven have control buttons identified with black text on a dark brown background? They are, to all intents and purposes, invisible. Now, the designer knows perfectly well the functions of all these controls, but I don't. I do not spend my working day thinking about microve ovens, so on the occasions I want to do something specific with my device I want to be able to see at a glance which does what without resort to a torch and a magnifying glass.

Then there's the cooker knobs, where the temperature markings wear off after a year's use, so now it's all guesswork.

The nightmare controls of VHS and DVD television recorders is well known. It is often said that if you want to program your recorder to catch your favourite show on the night that you are taking your wife out to a well-deserved dinner then you call in one of the grandchildren to do it for you. Actually the field of TV recording is one in which I am pleased to be able to admit that things are getting better rather than worse. The advent of the digital TV recorder, and in particular the "Sky+" system (and it's equivalents) make the business of setting up future recordings almost a pleasure; you can even tell it to record an entire series, and moreover you can be watching something totally different at the same time.

Don't get me started on personal computers. I love the things because of the way they (and the Internet) have transformed our lives and relationships, but I also hate their ability to crash at a critical moment and I loath the all-pervading influence of the Microsoft operating system and associated software they have imposed upon us. It's good to see, at last, real challenges to Microsoft: people like Mozilla and Google. It took the Mozilla Firefox web browser to show us that we didn't really have to use Internet Explorer if we didn't want to, and I suspect that without them leading the way with their superior browser we would not have had the benefit of the greatly improved Internet Explorer version 7. Now Google has come along with another browser called "Chrome" (still in beta) and I like it. It's faster than IE7 and has some good extra features. In it's current beta form, if you find any web page failing in some regard because you are using Chrome then you can easily notify Google of the problem and send a screen shot of the problem page.

Our cars now have so much technology in them that laws against the use of mobile phones when driving almost seem irrelevant when you consider the host of other potential distractions in front of you: CD players, MP3 players, radios with complex menu systems, automatic climate control buttons, rear window demisters, front window demisters, cabin lights, reading lights, windscreen wiper settings, fuel levels, miles per gallon right now, miles per gallon on average, hours driven, distance travelled this journey, distance travelled since you last had sex, and satellite navigation displays sending you down country lanes leading nowhere or a voice telling you to turn round on a motorway.

Yesterday my wife and I were doing some decorating in the bathroom and every now and then we could hear this electronic bleep. It occured about once every five minutes and at first we though it was something outside the house. We ignored it for some time, but eventually it began to worm its way into our brains and become annoying. The annoyance grew as we began to look around the house at all things electrical to see what it was trying to attract our attention. We disabled the downstairs smoke alarm, we disabled the upstairs smoke alarm, we looked at wireless "mice", we ripped batteries out of electronic weighing scales, we did the same with an electronic blood pressure monitor. The bleeping continued - a tiny little high-pitched bleep (more of a "blip" I suppose) every five minutes - coming from nowhere in particular. We were now reduced to ripping small battery alarm clocks apart, even though we knew that they had never, never given low-battery warnings, and were not designed to do so.  We took the batteries out of a Nintendo "brain trainer". Still it continued.

We forgot about the electronic intrusion whilst we watched evening television, and then when to bed. But we couldn't sleep; there was that bleep again. I tried to ignore it, but you can't, can you? You are laying there with your eyes closed trying to relax but actually you are just waiting for the next bleep. And you are never disappointed. It comes again.

Eventually I leaped out of bed, went across to my wife's handbag, took out her mobile phone. It was still switched on, and there it was .. "1 new message" .. a service announcement from Vodaphone.

The dubious joys of Technology.

 

Searching for the "God Particle"

Well, the CERN Large Hadron Collider has been switched on, and God knows what the 10,000 scientists involved are going to find when they start smashing these atomic particles together at nearly the speed of light. One wag has already suggested that, far from seeing what happened a millionth of a second after the "big bang", we might see what happened a millionth of a second before the "big bang" and it might be that what we shall see will be scientists switching on the ORIGINAL Collider!!

Anyway, I suspect that even if they find "Higgson's Boson" (or the "God Particle") I suspect we shall not be any the wiser. After all, assuming they find it, one then has to ask the question "Where did THAT come from?"

Was there NOTHING before that? What is the nature of NOTHING? How does NOTHING become SOMETHING?

Answers on a postcard please ..

Georgia - the Smell of Appeasement

There is a smell of 1930s-type appeasement in the air. The recent Russian incursion into Georgian territory and the reaction of the NATO countries to Russia's outrageous behaviour reminds me of the pathetic attempts to appease Adoph Hitler's Germany before the 2nd World War.

Clearly the Georgian President made an error of judgement in trying to act tough with the ethnic Russians of South Ossetia, but this does not excuse the Russian incursion into the sovereign territory of a neigbouring democratic State.

Georgia wants (or had wanted) to join NATO. The lily-livered response by the European NATO countries to the Russian invasion, and their hesitancy over admitting Georgia for fear of upsetting Russia is disgusting. Russia needs to know that we are prepared to draw boundaries on international behaviour, even if it means we put at risk some of our power supplies for which we are increasingly vulnerable to Russian whims. Russia is becoming rich on their supplies of oil and gas and it is inconceivable that they would be happy to start losing their new-found markets for the stuff.

As it is, Russia knows that democratic Europe is frightened of upsetting it. So what's next? Ukraine? Lithuania? Estonia? Latvia? Russia pretends to be a democracy, and I suppose that compared to the Communist era it has some of the trappings of democracy but that is far as it goes. There is no real freedom of expression and the State has a tight grip on the news media. Vladimir Putin has ceased to be President and is now Prime Minister, but still appears to call the shots and is what one might generously describe as a benevolent dictator (if that's not an oxymoron).

It's about time we in the rest of Europe started to stand up for what is right instead of turning a blind eye to what is wrong in the hope that no more wrong will be done.

A World without Religion?

Having seen on the TV news this morning that about 5 million people in the UK have a reading age of 12 I felt bound to reflect how lucky I am to be able to read at all. The ability to read is not only essential in order to get through the business of every-day life, but it is the gateway to knowledge, thought, discussion, escape, pleasure, tears, laughter.

So, why the title of this post - "A World without Religion?"

Well, it's just that many interesting books have passed through my hands in recent years, and the latest one is called "The God Delusion" by Richard Dawkins (Professor for the Public Understanding of Science at Oxford University).

Now Richard Dawkins is an Atheist, and proud of it, and his avowed intention in this book is to steer us all in the same direction. A short blog post is not the place to rehearse the arguments for and against the existence of God. I have neither the expertise, nor the willingness of you, the reader, to put up with whatever ramblings I could churn out on whether God should be faith-based or evidence-based.

Whether or not Dawkins has the power to turn a believer into a non-believer, he does invite us to consider some interesting points, which is where we come to the title of this post. Imagine a world without religion: the Manhattan skyline would still be dominated by the twin towers of the World Trade Centre; women would not be having their skin lashed for exposing too much of it; 20th century Northern Ireland would never have been the blood bath that it was; the Spanish Inquisition would never have occurred; innocent children would not be blown up by suicide bombers; American presidents could be elected on their merit, compassion, and leadership qualities irrespective of the need to profess a belief in God; there would be no well-heeled, bouffant hair-styled tele-evangalists ordering you to send them large quantities of money because God wants you to.

We are invited to consider the fact that, for the most part, your religion is dictated by accident of birth, so that a child of Christian parents knows that he is following the true path and that Islam is a false religion. Similarly the child of Muslim parents knows that he is following the true path and that Christianity is a false religion.

Also, there is no such thing as a "Christian Child" or a "Muslim Child" because they are too young to have made a decision in these matters. The decision has been made for those children.

We interpret and use the Bible to suit our own ends, cherry-picking the bits that fit nicely into our beliefs, ignoring the clear indication in the Old Testament that God appears to be a most unpleasant character, a jealous, petty, unjust, unforgiving control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sado-masochistic, capriciously malevolent bully.

The death penalty is prescribed for adultery, gathering sticks on the Sabbath, and for cheeking your parents.

Thomas Jefferson described the God of Moses as "cruel, vindictive, capricious and unjust."

But, by the time we get to the New Testament, God has become a gentle, all-forgiving and loving being, exemplified by Jesus.

Organised religion is awash with hate and hypocrisy. During the course of my professional life in environmental management, I had occasion to make regular inspections of the waste water treatment works serving a well-known boys' Roman Catholic public school run by monks and priests. There were, of course, some females on the premises - teachers, domestic staff, etc. We all know, of course, that Catholic priests and monks are celibate. So why, during my inspections, was I always astounded by the huge quantities of used condoms arriving at the treatment plant?

Yes, indeed it is sometimes tempting to look favourably upon a world without religion, and yes, I am so glad that I am fortunate enough not to be one of those 5 million people in the UK with reading difficulties, so that I can read the Bible and the Koran and Richard Dawkins and come to my own conclusions without someone else having the bare-faced audacity to dictate my beliefs.

Englishman for President!

It's going to be a tough call against Barak Obama, and then of course there's the small problem of the American Constitution, but what the hell - I'll give it a go!

Men in Dresses accept Women in Dresses

The Church of England Synod, meeting in York yesterday, accepted the principle of women bishops. Naturally the proposal created much controversy, causing many leading old farts in dresses to call for a breakaway Church loyal to the practice of male domination.

To my mind, once the Church had accepted the ordination of women as priests a few years ago, then the next logical step would be female bishops. I think the Church has made the right decision, and if some Neanderthals in holy orders want to break away, then the Church of England will be much improved without them.

One of the (many) great evils in this world is the existence of societies in which the concept of male domination and the assignment of women to subsidiary roles is regarded as the norm. It is a blight on many religious groups, including both Islam and Christianity. The Roman Catholic Church is a prime example.

It is therefore wholly laudable that the Church of England (which is, after all, the United Kingdom's established Church) has at last aligned itself with the equality laws passed by the UK Parliament.

Reducing the Plastic Bag Mountain

Shopping in Scarborough this morning I was encouraged to note how at last we appear to have succeeded in bringing about a culture change in regard to the use of plastic bags. Until recently (and I also plead guilty to this) we were amassing plastic bags as if they were going out of fashion .. and how appropriate, because they have indeed gone out of fashion.

The routine at supermarket checkouts always used to be the same: your goods fly past the scanner, down the chute and you stuff them straight into a dozen or so plastic bags provided free of charge for your convenience. Then you get home, empty all the bags and add to them the rising pile of old bags that you stuffed away somewhere. You will never take them out with you again next time you go shopping. When one day you realise that you have no possible use for 150 crumpled plastic bags you sling them out with the garbage and they add to the refuse landfill site of non-biodegradable materials, that are rapidly turning holes in the ground into refuse mountains.

Now we are being encouraged to fork out 5 pence for long-lasting re-usable shopping bags, and I noted this morning how many people in the queue for the checkout were now carrying their own permanent or semi-permanent means of carrying their shopping. Hey! just like Grandma and Grandpa used to do!

If you think about it, the old habit of using these millions of bags at supermarkets was completely unnecessary. After all, most of us visit a supermarket using a car. When we get there we pick up a trolley, we fill it with goods, we run the goods past the checkout then we refill the trolley to take our shopping back to the car. Why do we need bags? Empty the trolley into the back of the car .. have a couple of handy boxes in there to make things easier .. job done!

Robert Mugabe

"God appointed me President and only God can remove me"

So says the (clearly insane) president of Zimbabwe, Robert Mugabe.

To which there can be only one response ..

"Let us pray ..."

It's the old Irish Joke!

Lost traveller in Ireland: "Excuse me, but can you tell me the way to the new all-singing, all-dancing European Union?"

Irishman: "If I were you, sir, I wouldn't start from here."

In accordance with the Irish Constitution the Irish people were given a vote on whether or not to accept the Lisbon Treaty, and last week they said "NO". The Lisbon Treaty is supposed to be different from the "European Constitution" that was drafted a couple of years ago and to which the French and the Dutch also said "NO". Most people, however, (at least those who can understand the Lisbon Treaty) assert that there is little difference between the two, and on this basis the British Government should have honoured its promise to give British citizens a referendum on whether or not to accept. But no, of course, they reneged on the deal, trying to convince us that this is something quite different, and therefore needs only to be ratified by Parliament.

Since European law states that the Lisbon Treaty can only come into effect if ratified by ALL European States the Irish referendum result kills it stone dead - doesn't it?

I doubt it, because the European Union, though claiming to be democratic is quite the opposite, and the European Commission is hell bent on driving these changes through. As soon as the Irish said "NO" the bureaucrats were jumping out of their boxes to tell us that it would make no difference. So, no change there then.

Meanwhile, hats off to the Irish for saying "NO" to something that nobody understands, and reflecting the view of most European citizens that the Brussels bureaucracy has got too big for its boots and is interfering into too many internal affairs of the individual Nation States.

Is the BBC completely bonkers?

Why is the BBC paying Jonothan Ross (top) and Graham Norton (above) millions of pounds for their services as chat show hosts and reality TV show presenters?

Ross is an adult with the mind of an adolescent: his sense of humour has not progressed beyond the sixth form at school, and his reliance upon constant sexual innuendo and references to various bodily functions become increasingly boring. He is, in fact, a right royal pain in the backside. I am no prude, but this man is too much. His financial reward for his puerile performaces are obscene.

Whilst relying much on the same sense of humour for which licence fee payers are showering Ross with cash, Graham Norton can at least can be credited with being quite amusing, but again I cannot begin to understand why he is worth so much money.

Apparently the BBC governing body does not consider that the financial rewards given to Ross and Norton are excessive. I beg to differ.

The Rise of the Trumblies

Now that petrol and diesel are through the roof at over £5 a gallon I've noticed that as more and more car drivers are unable to afford to keep their tanks filled, more of them are driving everywhere at 40 mph or less in an attempt to conserve fuel. We are all becoming "trumblies".

This is increasing both journey times and the level of frustration. It is to be hoped that the Government will get the message being driven home through the current on-road protest by truck drivers that something needs to be done about the huge percentage of the fuel price at the pumps being taken in tax. We are, I think, the most heavily fuel taxed country in Europe.

Haulage companies are going out of business, and the cost of moving foodstuffs and other goods around the country is pushing up the price of everything.

On the subject of taxes I am sure we are all now wondering why our hard-earned cash is being used to fund the outrageous expense demands of Members of Parliament. Thanks to pressure exerted under the Freedom of Information Act we now know for the first time that our money is being used to fund (apparently legitimately) the most ridiculous things, such as installation of pergolas in gardens, mortgage interest payments on second homes that don't even have a mortgage, painting of second homes, maintenance of lawns and hedges, Sky TV subscriptions, and the employment of partners and relatives as Parliamentary Assistants. I'm not saying MPs don't do any work, but they do get paid handsomely for the privilege of representing us and I don't see why we should also be subsidising their additional luxuries. Next time some candidate or other canvasses me on my doorstep I shall demand to know what specific lifestyle extras he or she expects me to be funding if he or she is elected.

Gore Vidal brightens my Sunday

How refreshing it was to find Gore Vidal as a guest on Andrew Marr's Sunday AM TV program this morning.

It's always a good thing to have someone around who can shine a bright intellectual light into the murky corners of international politics.

As someone who knew President John Kennedy well he was asked by Marr whether it was right that people should see in Barak Obama something of the John Kennedy "Camelot" times. Vidal responded by saying that if he were Obama he would be rather put out by the comparison since whilst John Kennedy had an undoubted charismatic presence he didn't actually do anything useful - he initiated an abortive attempt at invading Cuba and he expanded the war in south east Asia.

Why then, asked Marr, should people be making this comparison?

Because, replied Vidal, we are talking about the United States of Amnesia.

As for George W Bush, the man is certifiable and he has a sinister Vice President with a liking for torture. This nest of ninnies has torn up the Magna Carta and the Constitution.

I couldn't agree more.

Inside the Mind of the Bureacrat

This morning I received a letter from my local District Council. They had written to me because my part-time work includes driving children to and from school. I was instructed either to attend a course on the safeguarding of children against physical, mental or sexual abuse, or to take the course online. The bureacrat who wrote the letter explained how I could find the appopriate website and how the course would be laid out. At the end of each module I would take an online test, and if I passed all four modules I would be able to print out my Certificate of Basic Awareness in Child Protection. So far so good, but then came the advice, "Your computer will need to be attached to a printer".

I can't help feeling that anyone not in possession of sufficient intelligence to realise that in order to print a document from one's computer it would need to be attached to a printer should not really be in charge of a vehicle, let alone children.

Anyway, I took the online course (it took about an hour) and passed all four tests. Fortunately I also managed to print out my certificate so I could send a copy to the bureacrat. Perhaps I should have enclosed an accompanying letter advising that in order to read it she should first remove it from the envelope.

Car Review

Can you remember all those Skoda jokes? A few years have gone by since they were common currency in the comedy world, harking back to the days of Communist Czechoslovakia and the somewhat less than wonderful cars they produced. Mind you, we bought them pretty cheaply so perhaps we shouldn't have complained. "You get what you pay for." I almost miss the jokes ..

How do you double the value of your Skoda? Remove the badge.
Why do Skodas have heated rear windows? To keep your hands warm when you're pushing it.

A lot has happened since those days: the "iron curtain" melted, and Czechoslovakia reverted to Slovakia and the Czech Republic. German car makers VW bought Skoda (they must have seen some real potential there) and the quality and consequent popularity of Skodas rose in leaps and bounds. In fact, some motoring correspondents say that the build quality of the vehicles coming out of the Czech factory surpasses that of the VW cars coming out of the German factories.

My own experience backs this up. I have been driving a Skoda Octavia 1.9 litre diesel with automatic gearbox for five years, and can report that it has not suffered a single significant problem. It has been a joy to drive and on long journeys returned over 55 miles per gallon.

A couple of weeks ago I decided to change my car, and so I exchanged my Skoda Octavia 1.9 diesel automatic for a Skoda Octavia 1.9 diesel automatic! It is a 2007 model with 12,000 miles on the clock, previously used by Skoda management.

Although the same model by name as my original car, it has important differences: it has a new 6-speed automatic "DSG" (dual shift gearbox), i.e., if you want manual changes for any reason you just move the gearshift sideways, then give it a nudge forwards to change to a higher gear and a nudge backwards to go lower. In normal automatic mode, although you can just hear changes in the engine note as it goes through the gears you feel absolutely nothing.

This model is the "Elegance" rather than my previous "Ambiente" and so has a higher spec., including automatic climate control that can be adjusted individually by the driver and the front seat passenger, plus a facility for cooling the glove box. The diesel engine is very quiet, and inside the car it is not much different from driving a petrol engine. Another nice touch is the automatically dimming rear view mirror when a bright light comes up behind you. Another new feature (to me at least) is Cruise Control which I tried out on the A64 dual carriageway between York and Malton, a section that includes a steep hill. It was great fun setting the speed at 70 mph, and taking my foot off the pedal. When we hit the steep hill, the car just dropped a gear and maintained 70 mph to the top of the hill, with me doing nothing but steer. (OK, you people who've been driving with cruise control for years - give me a break - this is my first. Allow me to display some pleasure!)

The in-car entertainment includes FM and AM radio, having three FM and three AM memory banks, each of which holds 6 stations, so that's up to 36 pre-set stations. There is a single CD slot above the radio console, but in the (cavernous) boot (sorry trunk, if you're American!) there is also a 6-CD changer unit, so there is potential for playing up to 7 CDs. If that isn't enough to be going on with you can also listen to all the music on your iPod.

I can't believe that there will still be people out there who worry about a Skoda badge on the front of their car, but I have no hesitation in recommending these reliable, well-built, economical cars.

Boris Johnson London Mayor - 1st Speech 2 April 2008

More people would take an interest in politics if all the major political parties encouraged outspoken, free-thinking, humorous politicians like Boris Johnson, instead of the usual cheerless, on-message automatons that seem to be the order of the day at the moment.

Goodbye Red Ken, hello Blue Boris

Last week's election for the Mayor of London produced an unexpected upset for the incumbent Labour Party's "Red Ken" Livingstone, or .. as he became known during the election campaign .. "Ken Leavingsoon".

After two periods in office (a total of eight years) he achieved quite a lot in raising the image of London, reducing traffic congestion, and encouraging new development. On the flip side, his traffic congestion charge became controversial when the charges started going up, and the control zone was extended. The London Underground private finance initiative went belly up, and Ken was also criticised for his allocation of large financial grants to some pretty weird and questionable organisations. He also liked to play host to controversial political and religious figures, especially from the Muslim community; and whilst he was happy to organise St Patrick's Day parades, he would not give house room to any demonstration of English pride on St George's day.

He was, and is, in many ways a bit of a comedian with a controversial love life and a passion for newts (though I hasten to add there is no connection between the two!)

Londoners were really given the chance of voting for one of two comedians, because along came Boris Johnson for the Conservatives out of the blue - he of the tousled hair, TV show performances, posh voice, and frequently voiced political gaffes.

Boris is such a loose cannon in the Conservative Party that he was soon assigned a team of advisers to try and keep him away from his role of comedian and firmly on the straight and narrow political message. But anyone who knows Boris knows that this is a waste of time. Indeed this is part of his success: he is so outspoken, so "un-PC", so good at appearing to be a complete buffoon whilst actually concealing a sharp intellect and huge knowledge that even those would rather stick pins in their eyes than vote Conservative grudgingly acknowledge their affection for him.

It was, then, perhaps no great surprise that he should manage to come along and upset Red Ken's applecart.

Liberal Democrat Brian Paddick (ex-police commander) was out of site. He is a decent man who nevertheless seems to have suffered a charisma bypass and was therefore completely unable to compete against the two larger-than-life characters fielded by the Labour and Conservative Parties.

Other News

Petty Bureacracy is alive and well

It's good to know that we still employ pea-brained "jobsworths" in public service to remind us just how stupid human beings can be. Last week an 82-year old woman disabled with Parkinson's Disease parked her car in Kendal to take a rest as she was feeling unwell. It was a no-parking area, but she possessed a "disabled" permit to display in her windscreen, so she was legally parked with the permit on display. Unfortunately she had not noticed that the permit was on display upside down. A parking warden came along, and rather than waking up the sleeping woman to politely draw attention to her oversight he just slapped a penalty notice on her windscreen. South Lakeland Council rejected her appeal.

In the same week, at the other end of the country, in London, a woman was prosecuted because her "Oyster" pre-paid bus card was 20p short of the amount for the journey. She swiped the card on the machine next to the driver and didn't notice the bleep indicating it was short of funds. The driver said nothing. During her journey an Inspector boarded the bus, and on checking her ticket said she was 20p short. The woman apologised and immediately got our her purse to pay the difference. The Inspector was having none of that: he said he would have to report her, she would get a form in the post on which she could explain herself. She got the form, explained the circumstances and submitted it. Next thing she knows is she's been summoned to appear before Sutton magistrates later this month.

What kind of country have we become, with such idiots messing up our lives? Is it a reflection of our education system that such people are produced and given paid jobs?

Who is Gordon Brown?

A regular American contributor of comments on this Blog responded to my last post about UK Prime Minister Gordon Brown by confessing to knowing little about him, nor even having seen a photograph.

Gordon Brown acquired a good reputation early on as Tony Blair's Chancellor of the Exchequer and was well known for his frequent use of the word "prudence" to describe what drove his financial policies.

Unfortunately, on the other side of the coin (geddit?) he was driven by an overwhelming ambition to replace Tony Blair as leader of the Labour Party and Prime Minister. In fact the story goes that when Blair was elected Leader he promised Brown that he would in due course make way for him at some stage. This made for a difficult (and sometimes imposssible) relationship between these two key men in government.

When Brown eventually realised his ambition last year he changed from the "Iron Chancellor" into the vaccilating Prime Minister, and also became haunted by some of the policies that he had been responsible for as Chancellor.

Some of his less savoury acts as Chancellor included imposing a tax regime that led to the near destruction of the insurance and pensions industry, and removing the financial incentives from the state of marriage.

He is the man who introduced a lower rate of income tax set at only 10p in the £ between the level of untaxed income and the level at which the normal rate of 22 pence applied, thus helping the lower paid. This is the same man who, bizarrely, last year slashed the normal rate of 22 pence to 20 pence (with a great fanfare) but at the same time abolished the 10 pence rate that he'd introduced a few years earlier. The result, this year, is that those of us who are reasonably well off are now better off, but those who are struggling are now worse off. (So much for the Labour Party being the party for working people and the disadvantaged.) The outcry within his own Party has been such that he has now been forced to promise some kind of refund for those who have suffered by the latest tax change.

After ten years of Labour Government the rich are richer, and the poor are poorer. We couldn't have asked for more from a typical Tory Government!

Brown, Britain and Basra

I read in today's paper that whilst Prime Minister Gordon Brown is in Washington gushing enthusiastically about his love of the USA, Americans, and American television, the love might not be reciprocated.

There may be two reasons for this: a lot of Americans don't know who the hell he is, and quite a few members of the gang currently occupying the White House are a bit pissed off with the performance of the British Army in Basra.

They don't like the fact that, having trained up the Iraqi army and police to do the job themselves (which, I recall, was their remit) they have withdrawn to an "overwatch" position. American generals want them back on the streets of Basra to give the militias there a good pounding. They are annoyed that Brown has declared his intention to draw down British troops in Iraq.

They had better get over it because we should have never have been there in the first place (nor should the Americans, come to that), and if the White House and the Pentagon think we should stay, well, tough titty! And if the Iraqis wish to conduct a civil war, then that's their business. Good luck to them, because they'll need it: Iraq is an artificial construct and I doubt if it can survive as such without it being propped up by someone else.

As for the question, "Who is Gordon Brown?" a prominent member of the Labour Party establishment opined yesterday that "Gordon Brown was put on this earth to remind us how good Tony Blair is."

The Man for Me

I thought I would watch five minutes of this but thirty minutes later I was still watching and listening. He's the man for me. It's a shame I don't have a vote! Clinton can't hold a candle to this man, and as for the present incumbent of the White House he appears by comparison to be even more of an intellectual dwarf than we had at first thought.

Hysterical E-mails and the Dollar Coin

I've just received one of those many e-mails that fly around cyberspace asking to be passed on to all one's friends to spread some rant or other on subjects that are usually associated with Patriotism, or the Military, or God, or all three together.

This latest one is about a new US Dollar coin and the e-mail urges Americans to refuse to accept it and ask for the paper version instead. Here in the UK we became similarly exercised some years ago when the £1 note was replaced by the £1 coin, but not for the same reasons that Americans are wound up about their Dollar. The British were upset because it was easier to carry a wallet full of notes than a pocket full of heavy coins.

Why are Americans upset by the Dollar coin? Well, this is what the e-mail says ..

"You guessed it - 'IN GOD WE TRUST' IS GONE!!!
If ever there was a reason to boycott something, THIS IS IT!!!!
DO NOT ACCEPT THE NEW DOLLAR COINS AS CHANGE
Together we can force them out ofcirculation.
Please send to all on you mail list !!!

This is ridiculous. Why?

Well, first of all, if you study this picture on the left you will see "IN GOD WE TRUST" engraved around the edge of the coin.

Second of all, if you trust in God, why do you need to be reminded of it on your money - any more than you need to be reminded of your patriotism by flying a flag outside your home? (something else I don't understand!)

Brown's "British" Buses

A couple of years ago the UK Government introduced senior citizens' bus passes entitling them to free travel on "local buses in their area". This was a welcome move, and moreover it was said we could look forward to the scheme being extended to provide travel on local buses in any part of the country.

That moment has arrived and we have been sent our new bus passes, together with an explanatory leaflet from which we learn the following: "From 1st April 2008, the new national bus concession will enable passholders to get free off-peak travel on local buses anywhere in England."

The statement is an oxymoron. .. NATIONAL bus concession .. anywhere in ENGLAND.

Now our (Scottish) Prime Minister has been banging on at great length since he took over from Tony Blair about the importance of being British and the desirability of preserving the United Kingdom. Why, therefore, can we not use our bus passes in Scotland or Wales?! And, if you live in Scotland or Wales you have your own passes, but I'm afraid you cannot use them in England. Why not?

Please, Mr Brown, do I live in England or do I live in Britain? I am confused. I am denied an English Parliament (unlike my Scottish and Welsh neighbours) but I am provided with an England-only bus pass.

Brown is several seats short of a double-decker.

Time Magazine on Britain's Teenagers

The latest edition of the American magazine Time contains a lengthy article on the apparent depths to which Britain's teenagers have descended. It is reported that 20% of the UK adult population is scared to walk the streets at night in our cities. As this magazine is published all around the world this feature can only be described as a huge embarrassment, not least to the Labour Government that, in ten years, has totally failed to deal with childhood poverty, discipline in schools, and effective policing.

In my view, part of the problem has been the fanatical devotion in recent years to so-called "Human Rights" with no counter-balancing devotion to the matter of "Human Responsibilities". In my book, if a teenager smashed out of his or her brain (as likely to be a girl as a boy) on cheap, readily available alcohol decides to stick a knife into you for the hell of it, then he or she forfeits all human rights. If someone gets tanked up on cheap, strong lager from their local supermarket before entering a night club to complete the process of brain and liver destruction, then falls out of the premises at 2 in the morning to vomit and urinate in the street before starting a fight, then the Police can, for my money, treat them as roughly as they like.

It's no use asking where the parents are because as like as not they are also smashed out of what passes for their brains.

Last night we were visited by two teenage friends. Their politeness, humour, attitude to work, ambition, and general appearance were a timely counterbalance to the above story, and we are fortunate enough to know many such young people. It is a desperate shame that these are not the people who make the newspaper headlines or get into Time Magazine.

Surfer's Soliloquy

To BLOG or not to BLOG, that is the question —
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous comments,
Or to take arms against a sea of e-mails,
And by opposing, end them. To cry, DELETE —
No more; and by deletion say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to — 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd. CTRL, then ALT —
DELETE, perchance to live! Ay, there's the ESC,
For in that real life what dreams may come,
When we have shuffled off this “virtual” coil,
Must give us pause. There's the respect
That makes calamity of “virtual” life,
For who can bear the dark blue screens of death,
The spammer’s songs, the offers of viagra,
The pangs of “virtual” love, the law's delay,
The insolence of chat rooms, and the loans
That have no merit and the gullible takes,
When he himself can’t clear his overdraft
With a bare cheque book? Who would be a bear
Of little brain in this computer’d life,
But that the dread of something after DEL,
The real-life country from whose bourn
No surfer returns, puzzles us still,
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all,
And thus the hue of pixel resolution
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
And variations of dot pitch and R G B
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And so I stay confused .. F1 for help?

With apologies to

William Shakespeare

Six Nations Rugby Lunacy

Is the England Coach Brian Ashton mad or what? I know Jonny Wilkinson's performance was a bit below par last weekend in England's lacklustre losing game against Scotland last weekend, but considering his undoubted special talent and his long record of point scoring for England it seems incredible to me that he is being dropped from the team for next week-end's game against Ireland.

OK, so we beat France the other week, but the England team is still a bit of a rabble, so to drop one of their star performers is bordering on the criminal.

During last week-end's game Jonny was certainly not at his best, but during that game he became the world record holder for the number of goal points scored by one man (1,099 points).

I shall be watching the England v Ireland with some trepidation (not to mention a certain lack of interest). I used to get a lot of enjoyment from these games just on the strengths of Jonny's kicking skills. France v Wales will probably be more interesting, as Wales has shot back from nowhere during this tournament and is top of the leader board at the time of writing this. Italy is at the bottom (heading for the "wooden spoon"?)

Oath of Allegiance

It has been suggested by Lord Goldsmith (former Attorney General, now adviser to the Prime Minister) that teenagers, before they leave school, should take part in a citizenship ceremony and take a formal oath of allegiance to Queen and Country.

WHAT A PREPOSTEROUS IDEA !!

I have always thought that one of the more endearing characteristics of the British People is their understated sense of identity and patriotism. Most of us feel British, (or English, or Welsh, or Scottish) and are proud to belong to this nation, but (unlike our American cousins) we do not feel so insecure and unsure of ourselves that we feel obliged to fly the Union Flag outside every house in the street, nor shovel our patriotism down each other's throats at every opportunity.

The proposal throws up one or two problems as well: what happens to those who refuse to take part in such a ceremony, or refuse to swear an oath of allegiance to the Queen? For myself, I am far from being a teenager, but if I was asked now to swear such an allegiance I would refuse. I don't mind swearing allegiance to my Country, but not to the Queen. I've nothing against her personally, and she makes a good fist of a ridiculous job forced upon her by accident of birth; I just don't believe in the concept of a hereditary monarchy. I am a democratic republican.

There is a lot to be said for British Citizenship courses and a graduating ceremony for legally admitted immigrants to the UK, but as for imposing such a thing on the indigenous population as part of the process of leaving school, I hope that the whole idea gets laughed out of court.

Tales from the back of the School Minibus

Part of my job is the transport of eight primary school children to and from school. They are aged between five and eleven years.

Listening to the surreal conversations of the five-year olds is part of the pleasure of the job.

Me: "Don't unfasten your seatbelt while I'm driving."
Child: "It's OK - there are never any police down this road."

Child (in state of excitement): "Lionel, guess what."
Me: "What?"
Child: "My mummy's buying me a new water bottle".

Child 1: "I had a rat sandwich for lunch."
Child 2: "You can't eat rats."
Child 3: "You can - it's meat."
Child 4: "Did you know you can eat a duck?"
Child 2: "You're not allowed to eat a duck."
Child 3: "Well, you can eat a duck, but only if it's mad."

You heard it here first, folks!

Prince Harry & the Drudge Report

There's been a bit of a heated debate going on as to whether or not Prince Harry should have been sent to the front line in Afghanistan, and in addition to that, given that he was sent, should there have been an agreement with the news media on a complete blackout for the duration?

Personally I don't give a stuff about whether or not he should have been sent, since I am not a Royalist. That being said it was clearly going to be the case that he was going to be (in his own words) a "bullet magnet" and so from the point of view of securing the safety of his entire unit, then secrecy can, I think, be justified. He had to be brought back home for his own safety and for the safety of his unit, after the American website Drudge Report blew his cover. Well, thanks for nothing, Drudge!

Jon Snow of Channel 4 News got all worked up about the press cover-up, suggesting that it detracted from the reliability and reputation of independent news providers. (He said this with foot in mouth, apparently unaware of the fact that Channel 4 News had been in on the agreement!)

The greasy, self-important, voluble and generally ghastly George Galloway ("Respect" MP) expressed the view that this made the BBC part of the war effort.

Newspaper Headline of the Week .. WHEN HARRY MET TALI

Newspaper Cartoon of the Week .. a 1066 newspaper hoarding declaring "KING HAROLD IN BATTLE OF HASTINGS - COVER BLOWN BY FOREIGN TAPESTRY".

The Earth Moved

At about one o'clock this morning England had a fairly rare experience .. an earthquake measuring 5.2 on the Richter Scale, centred on Market Rasen in Linconlnshire. Noise and vibration were experienced here in North Yorkshire, and apparently the effects were felt as far north as southern Scotland and as far south as the south coast of England.

I slept through it.

When my wife told me this morning that the earth had moved I just thought she was being polite.

The Appletree Inn, Marton, North Yorkshire

I make no apologies for devoting this post to the delights of The Appletree Inn, Marton (a tiny village a few miles west of Pickering, North Yorkshire.) My wife and I decided to have Sunday Lunch there, having read good reviews of the place.

We were not disappointed. Since 2001 it has been run by Melanie and husband "TJ" and they have turned the place into a friendly and comfortable pub serving food with a difference, cooked and presented stylishly by "TJ" who works alone in the kitchen. How he manages is a minor miracle. They also make sure that food is sourced locally, and much of it is grown in their own vegetable garden. Can't get much more local than that!

We enjoyed a pre-lunch drink in the lounge area, sitting in comfortable arm chairs in front of a good log fire. Newpapers were provided.

For starters my wife had delicious smoked salmon and a side salad whilst I tried (for the first time) carrot and chestnut soup. When we moved on to the main course it was two more "firsts" for us: my better half had steamed hake on a bed of risotto, and for me roasted loin of hare on a bed of shredded cabbage with redcurrant sauce. We had no difficulty in being persuaded to order desserts, and I tucked into an excellent dark treacle tart accompanied by lemon curd ice cream and lime sauce - washed down with a glass of sweet wine .. a "Noble Reisling".

None of this comes cheap of course, but good things are worth paying for. My wallet was thinner to the tune of £70 by the time we left, but I didn't feel in any way cheated. One should splash out once in a while, as nobody has yet found a way of taking your money with you when you die.

It comes as no surprise that The Appletree was awarded "National Dining Pub of the Year" in the The Good Pub Guide 2008. This is added to a list of eight other awards picked up since 2001.

I don't get free meals for life for writing this piece (though it might be worth a try!)

The title of this Post links to the Appletree Inn Website.

Bon Appetit!

Letter to our Prime Minister

Dear Gordon Brown,

After ten years of Labour Government it seems appropriate to review our situation.

I write as a one-time active supporter (and paid-up member) of the Labour Party.

I am no longer a paid-up member and you are becoming perilously close to losing my support as well.

So, what's gone right? Well, not much actually. All I can think of from my personal point of view as a "senior citizen" is that I have benefited from an annual payment of a winter fuel allowance and I also have a free bus pass. So thanks for that (though even the winter fuel allowance is now looking a bit sick against the huge rise in energy prices these past few months).

I used to think devolving power to Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland was a good idea. It still is a good idea except that you made a botched job of it by completely ignoring England in the process, so we now have MPs from the Celtic fringes determining the laws that govern the English, but the English have no say whatsoever in the laws governing the domestic matters of Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland. I've nothing against having a UK Prime Minister who is a Scot representing a Scottish constituency, but you'd better wake up and smell the coffee that is the resentment currently brewing in England. So - only 5 out of 10 for devolution.

As for the rest, well it's all been downhill...

• We have been committed to an illegal war based on false intelligence.
• Our children are being tested to destruction to meet targets.
• Our hospitals keep incoming patients outside in ambulances to meet bed targets.
• It's almost impossible for most people to find an NHS dentist.
• Indirect taxation has gone through the roof.
• Billions of taxpayers' £s have been used to shore up a badly managed bank.
• Immigration from eastern Europe, Asia and Africa is completely out of control.
• Personal data held on government IT systems have been lost on a massive scale.
• Children in parts of our cities are totally out of control, shooting and knifing each other and beating up and killing anyone who dares to confront them.
• Children are getting drunk out of their skulls on a daily basis using easily available and cheap alcohol.
• Many town centres are no-go areas at night unless you enjoy watching drunken idiots (many of them women) urinating and vomiting in the streets.
• The Family Tax Credit system is so complicated and badly managed that it is not being used by those who need it, and those who do use it find themselves being told they've been overpaid, and face demands for it to be returned.
• The Police are useless because most of their time is spent on paperwork.
• We pander to the sectional demands of immigrant groups instead of encouraging them to integrate into British society.
• We translate leaflets and signs into dozens of different languages instead of insisting on the learning of one common language.
• The condition of our roads is a disgrace, and if we want to travel by train we are faced with the most expensive railway system in the whole of Europe.
• Our Members of Parliament misappropriate our money in outrageous expenses claims, including the payment of family members for work that cannot be quantified, or for trivial maintenance jobs on second or third homes.
• We are subjected to a constant barrage of Government exhortations and regulations as a substitute for real policy or sense of direction. It is micromanagement to the nth degree.

I will close by reminding you that it is generally the case that Opposition Parties do not win general elections, Governments lose them. This, I strongly suspect, is what is going to happen to you at the next General Election, and it will be well deserved.

Canterbury Tales

The Archbishop of Canterbury has stirred up a hornets' nest by expressing the opinion that Britain will inevitably have to come to some accommodation with Islamic Sharia Law in the interests of social adhesion.

I have never heard so much garbage from the mouth of a Church Leader. He claims to have been misunderstood and misreported, but I should have thought that a man in his position would be able to string a few words together in a manner that can be understood. But then making himself understood has never been his strong point.

We are all equal under the Laws of the United Kingdom - laws that have been developed by general consensus over hundreds of years, many of which have been underpinned by the teachings of Judo-Christian Faiths. The problem with Islamic Sharia Law is that there is no one interpretation of what it means. It is applied in different ways in different Islamic communities. One thing is certain: men and women are not accorded equal value under Sharia Law. And we all know how the law is applied in some Islamic countries such as Saudi Arabia for example. Are we saying we want to come to some accommodation with the concept of female inferiority, punishment by stoning, punishment for being a victim of rape? I don't think so.

I had some sympathy with a view put forward by someone on the radio the other day. He said all Anglican Christians should now be beating a path to the door of the nearest Catholic Church to begin the conversion process!

To end on a lighter note, perhaps the contributor to Terry Wogan's morning radio programme had it right. Archbishop Williams was trying to persuade the Blairs to return to the Anglican Church by saying we should reach an accommodation with Cherie's Law!

Dental Hell

Yesterday I suffered the Dental Appointment from Hell. I had been looking forward to the worst, and I was not disappointed.

It was 1 hour and 45 minutes in the dentist’s chair with two dentists and a nurse buggering about inside my mouth. First they had to slice away a bridge using a tungsten carbide disc and this took about 45 minutes. Then they spent the next hour trying to an extract a rotten tooth that had been supporting one end of the bridge. This stubbornly refused to budge, and the dentists were taking turns to get a purchase on it and tug it from its moorings. Half way through they set up a large cooling fan. (This wasn’t for me, it was for them as they were now breaking into a sweat!)

The tooth progressively broke up into three bits, leaving the roots. The three good ladies (it is an all-female dental practice) then had to resort to cutting away some gum, and even that wasn’t enough: they had to cut away some bone as well before the two roots threw in the towel and came out. During this delightful procedure they had to give me several shots of local anaesthetic three times during the operation.

I returned home for an hour’s rest before embarking upon my afternoon school transport runs.

My evening dinner was soup and pain killers.

This morning I was well healed and relatively pain free, and (better still) I only had to pay £43.60 so .. let's hear it for the ladies of the Pickering Dental Health Practice!

Phones, Poetry, Predictions & Purgatory

Sunny Sunday morning and I awake to the sounds of a starling outside the bedroom window doing phone impressions (that's the bird, not the window). I wonder if there really is a phone ringing inside the house somewhere but there isn't. I ignore the bird and wait for it to switch to the answering machine but it doesn't. The starlings in temporary residence in the ivy outside the window here are a constant source of entertainment to us. Some are given to serenading with long drawn-out upward rising whistles and then back down again, much like that novelty wind instrument that looks like a bicycle pump and has a pitch variation depending on how far you have pulled or pushed the plunger.

I read an interesting snippet about the late Brendan Behan, famous Irish writer (and drinker). He was once asked by a literary lady to define the difference between poetry and prose in his work. He replied:
There was once a young man called McFee
Who worked for Accles and Pollocks,
He went for a walk by the sea
And the water came up to his knees.
"That's prose, Missus," says Brendan, "but another few inches of water and it would have been poetry."

The race for the US Presidency is providing much interest and excitement and I feel that we are being treated to a higher-quality range of candidates than was the case the last time around. But that's not making it any easier for me to adopt a preference on the outcome. (Not that I have any say in the matter, being English. The outcome, however, is still important to people outside of the USA because of that country's power and influence for good or for evil.)

Of course, anything or anyone is going to be better than the small shrub currently occupying the White House. Although my heart and soul resides more naturally within the philosophies of the Democratic Party I am not awe-struck by either of the two front runners. Is it going to be America's first black President or America's first female President? I am neither influenced by colour or gender in this matter .. although I might sit up and take notice if there was the possibility of a first black female president. Come to think of it, perhaps that would be the dream ticket - President Hillary Clinton and Vice-president Barak Obama (or vice versa).

But in all honesty I do not find Barak Obama to be the charismatic orator that some claim he is, nor can I find it in my heart to actually like Hillary Clinton. As for the Republican candidates I find myself strangely drawn towards John McCain. I like his style, his depth of experience, his sense of humour and his preparedness to cross party lines where necessary and his unwillingness to feel constrained by the dogmas of his own Party. I think he's in with a chance.

So my predictions are as follows: Hillary Clinton will be the Democratic candidate; John McCain will be the Republican candidate; and the next President of the USA will be John McCain.
(You heard it here first, folks!)

One side of my face has been on fire for a week (notwithstanding a cocktail of antibiotics and pain killers), and so I am actually looking forward to visiting my dentist tomorrow. I have a bridge supported at one end by a tooth that has given up the will to live and which will need, in all probability, to be extracted. This means the bridge will first have to be demolished .. sounds like a job for the Royal Engineers. With the bridge gone and the tooth gone there will be a huge space.

Watch this space.

An Evening with Patrick Hutchinson "Soul Toucher"

The bloke on the left with his hand on fire is Patrick Hutchinson. He calls himself a Medium who can talk to the dead, and rejoices in the name of "Soul Toucher".

Last night he was "performing" at the Old Lodge Hotel, Malton, North Yorkshire. I went along with my good lady. We went with an open mind. The only spirits I encountered that evening had labels on them, like Gordons, Smirnoff, Jack Daniels and so on, and the only "Medium" described the dryness of the white wine my wife was drinking.

Hutchinson's ineffectual prattling in a strange variety of accents nearly had me asleep within the first 20 minutes, and every half sentence was punctuated with his incessant use of the expression "OK?" which actually came across as "Auk Eye?" He singularly failed to make contact with anyone useful "on the other side", and even with some of the audience almost willing him to come up with something meaningful (like some lady volunteering the name "Michelle" when Hutchinson said he was in touch with someone called "Mary") it just didn't work.

At one stage he tried to prove some kind of point by placing a table in the room, putting a wine glass on the table, then inviting a few people from the audience to stand around it with their hands on the glass. Whilst the rest of us (who could see very little) started to fall asleep Hutchinson tried very hard to will some spirit or other to move the glass towards him. This it steadfastly refused to do, so he tried exchanging some of the people, and also moved the table to another position. This went on for about 20 minutes with nothing happening and I developed the view that if these poor people stood around the table for long enough they would become so tired and fed up that one of them would push the glass to end the agony. I entertained the thought that this might be Hutchinson's modus operandi.

I would have been suitably impressed if he managed to make the glass move without having people stood round it with their hands on it!

Hutchinson's website has a number of photographs taken at the various locations he has performed in, and they purport to show "orbs" appearing in various parts of the room, either flying around or hanging stationery in some part of the room. They really are laughable. Here's one of the pictures, and one of these orbs is pointed out as being on the back of Hutchinson's jeans (he's the guy in the red shirt) ..

Now you have seen the "orb" hovering in the vicinity of his left buttock, I'm going to show you a photograph I took at the Edinburgh Military Tattoo last August, and here you will be delighted to see that I have been able to capture more "orbs" than you can shake a stick at.

The military tattoo must have been a very spiritual occasion, and I'm wondering if I should think seriously about becoming a Medium myself. I could earn myself £800 a night peddling the garbage that was thrown over us last night at The Old Lodge.

For a fuller description of the evening's events (and not a few laughs into the bargain) I would commend to you this post on the Bad Psychics website. Here is the link ..

http://badpsychics.com/thefraudfiles/modules/news/article.php?storyid=663

What are the Police for?

In particular, what are the Cheshire Police for?

Adam Swellings, Jordan Cunliffe and Stephen Sorton - all semi-permanently drunk teenage vandals on the rampage in Warrington - have at last been sent to prison "for life", but for this piece of justice to be done they had to kick a father of three to death outside his own home for daring to confront them. But for months before this happened this gang of drunken sub-human idiots had regularly terrorised decent people, and in spite of constant complaints to the Police, local officers were either unable or unwilling to anything about them.

The ringleader of the gang has had at least 11 previous convictions for assault, and breaches of restraining orders. Not long before murdering Garry Newlove outside his home he had been arrested for punching a man who caught him damaging his car. He was remanded in custody but some JP with half a brain allowed him out on bail on condition that he stayed away from the streets of Warrington.

I am wondering when we are going to reach the point when we all accept that thugs who inflict physical punishment on innocent people should themselves have physical punishment inflicted on them. How much longer are we going to be so ridiculously soft on these dregs of society. And I am wondering when the Police are going to get off their arses and help us reclaim our streets. And I am wondering when - on those welcome occasions when the Police do round them and bring them to court - our magistrates and judges will back them up by not releasing them back into the community again with a slap on the wrist and an instruction to stay away from certain areas.

Wake up England, for God's sake!

New Year Resolutions

I'm not a great fan of new year resolutions because they tend to be forgotten about within a couple of weeks, and so the only new year resolution I am going to make at the start of 2008 is to see in 2009 (though not in a hurry).

One of my friends who blogs around in this particular blogosphere has said she wants to enter the new year with the ability to love and be loved. That is probably the wish of most people, though clearly not one shared by Osama Bin Laden and his followers.

Having reached the age of 70 just before the new year I am reminded of British comedy writer Denis Norden who said "One of the advantages of being 70 is that you need only four hours sleep. True, you need it four times a day, but still .."

Richard Armour, US poet and author, said, "Each year it gets harder to make ends meet - the ends I refer to are the hands and feet."

Happy New Year!

"A Common Word" - Hope for the New Year?

Just before Christmas my eye caught sight of an advert in the newspaper I was reading. It had been placed by a group of Muslim leaders, clerics and scholars and was headed "A Common Word". It went on ...

"A Muslim Message of Thanks and of Christmas and New Year Greetings, December 2007"
"In the Name of God, the Compassionate, the Merciful
May God bless Muhammad and his kin and bless Abraham and his kin
Al-Salaamu Aleikum; Peace be upon you; Pax Vobiscum
Peace be upon Jesus Christ who says: Peace is upon me the day I was born, the day I die, and the day I am resurrected (Chapter of Mary; the Holy Qur’an; 19:34).
During these joyful holidays we write to you, our Christian neighbors all over the world, to express our thanks for the beautiful and gracious responses that we Muslims have been receiving from the very first day we issued our invitation to come together to ‘A Common Word’ based on ‘Love of God and Love of Neighbor’ (see

http://www.acommonword.com/

for the document and the responses).
We thank you and wish you all a joyous and peaceful Christmas Holiday Season commemorating the birth of Jesus Christ, may peace be upon him."

"We Muslims bear witness that: There is no god but God, without associate, and that Muhammad is His Servant and Messenger, and that Jesus is His Servant, His Messenger, His Word cast to Mary, and a Spirit from Him …. (Sahih Bukhari, Kitab Ahadith al-Anbiya’).
We pray, during these blessed days, which have coincided with the Muslim feast of the Hajj or Pilgrimage, which commemorates the faith of the Prophet Abraham (peace be upon him), that the New Year may bring healing and peace to our suffering world. God’s refusal to let Abraham (peace be upon him) sacrifice his son—granting him instead a ram—is to this day a Divine warrant and a most powerful social lesson for all the followers of the Abrahamic faiths, to ever do their utmost to save, uphold and treasure every single human life and especially the life of every single child. Indeed, it is worthy of note that this year Muslim scholars issued a historic declaration affirming the sanctity of human life—of every human life—as an essential and foundational teaching in Islam upon which all Muslim scholars are in unanimous agreement (see details at http://www.duaatalislam.com/). "

"May the coming year be one in which the sanctity and dignity of human life is upheld by all. May it be a year of humble repentance before God, and mutual forgiveness within and between communities."

"Praise be to God, the Lord of the worlds."

Now I am far from being a religious scholar, or even a religious person. Indeed my practise of Christianity is paltry in the extreme, but I do try to follow the basic teachings in conducting my life. I have also been driven by doubts over many years about whether formal religion is of any benefit at all since religious belief seems to be at the heart of a great deal of major conflicts around the world, and in particular the age-old conflict between Christianity and Islam features large in our present-day world. Indeed there is a dangerous degree of polarisation taking place and a good deal of inflammatory and racist language been thrown in for good measure. It is not helped by recent waves of terrorist atrocities committed by people claiming to be true followers of Islam.

I therefore recommend anyone reading this to have a look at http://www.acommonword.com/index.php?lang=en

and consider whether it gives grounds for hope that a group of prominent followers of Islam are pointing out the common roots and teachings of Judaism, Christianity and Islam.

As one of the contributors to the website's discussion pages had pointed out, words need to be followed by actions. He cites the fact that most Christian countries are happy to permit the building of mosques and the following of Islam (this is certainly true in the UK!) and yet in so many Muslim countries it is nigh on impossible for a Christian to follow his religion opnely. This has to be addressed.

But, when all is said and done, even the longest and most difficult journeys must begin with the first steps.