BBC London News 10th November 2013 ..
Rush hour commuters are being asked to walk or cycle instead of taking trains on a London Underground line in an attempt to reduce overcrowding.
Travellers are being asked to avoid getting on the Northern Line between Tooting Bec and Clapham North between 0800 GMT and 0845.
Transport for London (TfL) said commuters often had to wait for two or three trains before they could board.
What a splendid idea. Why don’t we extend this idea to other walks of life? ..
***
Saturday morning shoppers in Tesco are being asked to visit the nearest field to pick their own cabbages in an attempt to reduce overcrowding in the fruit and vegetable aisles.
Shoppers are being asked to avoid the Tesco fruit and veg aisles between 0900 and 1145 on Saturdays.
Tesco said shoppers often had to wait for two or three cabbages to be placed in other people’s trolleys before they could get near the display.
***
Week-end car drivers entering Pickering are being urged to park on grass verges, footpaths and other people’s front gardens instead of using the public car parks in an attempt to reduce congestion.
Drivers are being asked to avoid going into the car parks between 9 am and 12 noon on Saturdays because they are nearly always full.
A Council spokesperson said drivers often had to wait for two or three cars to vacate the car park before finding a space. He went on to say that in accordance with normal Council policy, all cars parked other than in the car parks would still be subject to the usual charges, and the long walk to the Pay-and-Display ticket machines would be beneficial to health.
***
Commuters between Malton and York are being urged by First TransPennine Trains to use the Yorkshire Coastliner Buses as the trains are overcrowded between 0800 and 0900 on weekdays.
A spokesperson for First TransPennine asked travellers to consider travelling by bus because people were having to wait for two or three trains to go past before they could get on one. Since the trains ran at a frequency of only one per hour this tended to cause a bit of a problem, with workers arriving at their place of work only to find it was time to go home again.
He went on to say that since the concept of a Bus Replacement Service was so well known this alternative means of transport would feel comfortably familiar.
***
Commuters between Malton and York are being urged by Yorkshire Coastliner Buses to use First TransPennine trains as the buses are overcrowded between 0800 and 0900 on weekdays.
A spokesperson for Yorkshire Coastliner asked travellers to consider travelling by train because people were having to wait for two or three buses to go past before they could get on one. Since the buses ran at a frequency of only one per hour this tended to cause a bit of a problem, with workers arriving at their place of work only to find it was time to go home again.
***
People using their cars to commute between Malton and York are being urged to go by train or bus as the A64 is packed solid between 0800 and 0900 on weekdays.
The Highways Agency said that 20-mile long queues of 4 mph traffic were seriously interfering with the free movement of Highways Agency vehicles. A spokesperson suggested that if every car driver could travel by bus or train then the A64 would be a much more attractive route for car drivers.
The same spokesperson also made the point that in view of the fact that there had been calls since about 1960 for the A64 to be made 100% dual carriageway, and that absolutely nothing had been done towards bringing this to fruition over a period of about 50 years it must be obvious to most people that it never would be done. A feasibility study would now be undertaken on the possibility of turning it into a major cycle path, something that could only be achieved if drivers switched to buses and trains.
***
Sick people are being asked to treat themselves at home instead of visiting Doctors’ Surgeries, Hospitals, and NHS Walk-in Centres.
The Secretary of State for Health said waiting times at all these treatment centres were far too long. Some people were having to wait two or three weeks before even getting a doctor’s appointment, by which time they had recovered from their illness. By the time they got to see the doctor they were already better, thus wasting the doctor’s time.
He suggested that people should sit and wait in the comfort of their own homes waiting to be seen by themselves and self-diagnosed as hypochondriacs, and during the waiting period (in front of their TV) they would recover.
Acknowledging that this would be seen as controversial he stressed that this would free up doctors’ time to see those who were genuinely ill either with stress-related high blood pressure caused by driving in endless traffic jams, or claustrophobia caused by travelling on overcrowded buses and trains.
* * *
